The Spirit Helps Our Difficult Conversations

Asa was known as a good king ‘who did what was right in the eyes of the Lord.’ More than the two kings who preceded him, he worked to replace idol worship with worship of the Lord throughout Judah. Anyone who approached Asa to improve on these reforms needed more than inspirational words to motivate him to continue this work.

The Spirit of God came on Azariah son of Oded. He went out to meet Asa and said to him, ‘Listen to me, Asa and all Judah and Benjamin. The Lord is with you when you are with him. If you seek him, he will be found by you, but if you forsake him, he will forsake you. For a long time Israel was without the true God, without a priest to teach and without the law. But in their distress they turned to the Lord, the God of Israel, and sought him, and he was found by them. In those days it was not safe to travel about, for all the inhabitants of the lands were in great turmoil. One nation was being crushed by another and one city by another, because God was troubling them with every kind of distress. But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.’ (2 Chronicles 15:1-7)

Azariah didn’t flatter Asa for all he had done or shame him for all he hadn’t done, nor did he provide Asa with anything like a rational argument or a comprehensive strategy. Instead, Azariah’s words empowered by the Holy Spirit framed all that Asa had done within the history of Israel and encouraged him to continue his reform work. Asa's response resulted in a significant recommitment to the Lord by many in Israel and a strengthening of his kingdom.

When we find ourselves needing to have a difficult conversation with someone, it’s easy for us to rely only on ourselves to determine the best approach. But this often leads us to speak harsh truth without love, or spineless love without truth, or focus so much on why they should act or how they should act that we miss the heart of the matter. The story of Azariah and Asa encourages us to spend time in prayer before we have difficult conversations. We should ask for the Holy Spirit to empower us in what we say and how we say it, which may first lead us to humility where we take the plank out of our own eye so we can see clearly to take the speck from the other person’s eye (Matthew 7:5). We should also ask that the Spirit empowers them to hear what he desires them to hear, which takes the pressure off us to say everything perfectly. We should expect that some who receive our Holy Spirit empowered words will reject them just as so many rejected the words of Jesus, but we can also expect great blessing for those who hear and respond well!